We spend our time and energy pretending we all have it together when really, we’re all just a little fucked up.
Front all you want for social media. Your relationship is perfect. Your job is valuable. Edges grown in. Skin cleared.
Every day, bih? I’m not buying it.
Well, you know what? Maybe it is true for you.
It ain’t true for me.
My weight is up. My finances are down. And my sex life is nonexistent. Shit hurts, bruh.
It takes far too much energy to pretend to be happy and living my best life every day. It takes too much energy to go out and fake smiles. It requires too much of my time to listen to other people lie to me about their lives.
Most of you reading this may think I’m writing this from a bitter place. You’re wrong. I’m actually dancing in my chair as I’m typing this. Not because my scale was down five pounds this morning (🤷🏾♀️ I have no idea. I’m not stepping on that bastard). But because I’m owning my truth. I’m not afraid of it. Nor am I afraid of anyone’s opinion of it.
I truly need to beg your forgiveness. I apologize for every time I gave you away for less than your worth. I apologize for any time I allowed an Unqualified to believe they could get close to you. I am truly sorry for any time I subjected you to D that couldn’t fulfill you.
The biggest mistakes I’ve made in life could all be rooted in my allowing others to set my price—Lessees masquerading as Buyers, presenting an offer that should have gotten them laughed off the lot. Instead, I accepted it with the hope my value will be realized at a later date. A quote attributed to Eartha Kitt says, “Many men wanted to lay my down. Only a few wanted to pick me up.” Pussy, I am sorry for settling for the former instead of having the courage to wait on the latter.
(Nix Note: We have a guest post today from Amelia Nathlie! This is her second post for the site. Find her first here. If you are interested in having a post featured, please send an email to firstname.lastname@example.org.)
Yep! You read it right! Like Usher, this is My Confession. I gamble with everything in my life. Gambling is about logic, not just luck. It’s about strategy. Know what you’re willing to lose and stop there. Recently, I’ve anted up my heart. I risked it ALL for love. (I KNOW. Silly me huh?) Maybe I should see an addiction counselor, but just stick with me.
It was more than a coincidence to sit behind this man at a football game, only to find out he’s the same man that my daughter was trying to tell me about a few weeks before that. Nope. I was just in the right place at the right time. He inquired about me, and my logic kicked in “This is divine placement.” We started dating and things started getting more and more serious. The naysayers were seated appropriately in their judgment section with their usual pledges, anthems, and mottos. Strong-willed, determined, and armed with a strategy, I was ready for a seat at the table.