Why Not Hoe?

When I think about my early to mid-twenties, all I can recall are tequila shots and penises.

Not even faces or names…just penises.

My memory is shot about those I did in my 20s. It’s as if my brain decided to permanently delete the useless. True story, this guy approached me earlier this year and was like, “don’t I know you?” Nah. After some attempts by him to jog my memory, it turned out he was one of those random penises of my 20s.

*shrugs* I’ve had a lot of D in my day.

I was like Goldilocks. I was gon’ try each one until I found the one I liked.

You can call it being sexually liberated. Lemme call it what it was: a hoe phase.

And darlings, I enjoyed my hoe phase.

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Ladies, I think I may have been steering you wrong. You see I’ve told you what love should feel like, how a man should treat you, where your standards should be. And all of that does matter. And if any of you use IG, you know one of the most popular hashtags is #relationshipgoals. It’s inspirational to see these amazing couples sharing their happiness with the world, and we are all hopeful that one day that will be us. And though I am no love expert, I am more than willing to share my trials and tribulations on my journey to finding my happy ever after on this site with you.

But I have to be truthful here. I’ve had pleasant relationships in my life, but nothing has ever made me happier than GOOD Dk. I’ve stated how amazing sex is a huge must of mine, but I feel I need to properly emphasize and encourage what Dk is and is capable of and how you should never settle for a lesser Dk. And what better time than the Monday before Thanksgiving because I am very thankful for GOOD Dk. So thankful, I’ve decided upon a new hashtag for today. #RelationshipGoals are nice and heartwarming, but #DkGoals are what’s required. I don’t want nice. My heart isn’t what I want touched. I want intoxication. I want my soul snatched. I need that GOOD.

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Anytime, Anyplace

“Baby…would you mind touching me…ever so slowly…You’re making me quiver”

I think every woman remembers the exact moment she heard “Would You Mind” by Janet Jackson. I was a sophomore in college sitting in my dorm room when my roommate played it. Our jaws both dropped, and we jammed that track on repeat until we knew every lyric. Because that song was as sex as sex gets. And it was about a woman’s pleasure. What will get her juices flowing, how dirty she wants to get, what she wants to do to him, and what she wants him to do to her. I think I’ve been remembering my sex life all wrong. I’m pretty sure Miss Janet gave me my first orgasm.

I’m amused when men think they have a monotony on nastiness. Talk all that shit you want about unloading in her face, having two or three at a time, eating ass, etc. Ha. That’s cute. You may have a little nastiness in you, but women?

Women are filthy.

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